Since it is Monday, here is a random beheading.
Monday, August 23, 2010
Pallas Cat
I am fascinated with the Pallas cat. If you notice, the pupil of their eyes are round, not slit-like other cats.
Since it is Monday, here is a random beheading.
Since it is Monday, here is a random beheading.
Fast Zombies, Slow Zombies
I have always had a rather clear idea of how I wanted undead in my games and what their origin would be. This ties fairly closely with Clerics, religion and has a bit of Dante's Inferno in it as well:
The Dead - Dead which are both faithful and buried on consecrated ground will never rise from the dead. If the consecrated ground is somehow marred or tainted, this is no longer true. The dead which are not buried on consecrated ground are vulnerable. The dead of the sinful are likewise vulnerable, although consecrated ground makes it significantly less likely they would rise. The sinful who are not buried on consecrated ground are very vulnerable, and this chance goes up the more horrible their crimes. Lastly, those murdered or slay themselves are also vulnerable.
So, clerics, priest and their acolytes definitely make it a priority to firstly consecrate holy ground and bury their dead therein. Otherwise bad things can happen, especially if you have some real bastards among your population. Site of mass battles are especially vulnerable considering the amount of violence was wrought and the likelihood of lost or forgotten bodies - or simply mass graves or otherwise desecrated remains. All a prime site of dead rising.
Consecrated ground, just like consecrated water, can harm undead. Most will not cross consecrated soil, but some of the exceedingly powerful undead can make a save vs Death to do so. Consecrated ground, even a handful, will harm undead if they touch it, 1hp per round. A Cleric's weapon can likewise be consecrated by himself to deal 1 extra point of damage to undead. Consecrated holy water is even more potent (as holy water rules). Consecrated relics are more potent still, especially in the hands of the person who consecrated it (turn undead rules).
Now for the actual undead:
Zombies / Skeletons - Skeletons and Zombies are more or less identical, but in different stages of decay. Zombies are Skeletons are the unwilling undead. That is, not particularly evil individual that have been made unto walking undead to serve a higher (evil) will. The bodies are unwilling, and so are forced into action that is not of their nature - and so their awkward and lumbering movements appear forced and strained. These undead are soulless vessels however will obey their master's will without question. (ie, slow zombies)
All undead after this point forward are the sinful dead and considerable more dangerous. Unlike the unwilling dead above, they do not hold back, and move quickly with deliberate determination (ie, fast zombies). These undead do have souls; often twisted, evil and malicious.
Ghoul - Ghouls are the remains of carnal malefactors. Those who went to extremes of lust or gluttony and now seek out the most perverse pleasures or to eat the most decrepit of things (with peoples on top of their list). They usually appear as they died - a corpse in the beginning stages of decay, smelling of rot, dirt stained with perhaps a seeping wound or noose around the neck.
Wight - Wights are the remains of the extremely avaricious or miserly (including many previous holy-men). Wights are distorted versions of their previous lives. They often have overly large hands, tongues or skin that is sloughing off of their body. All Wights drag around huge sack of what which they desire - usually heavy coins but sometimes other things such as small children. Wights attack viciously those who have more of what they desire (wealth, belongings, youth, beauty and so forth). They will ignore those who appear to have nothing that they want.
Shadow - Shadows are those that found no joy in life or god. They exist two dimensionally and are horribly wrathful beings who spite everyone and everything. They are humanoid shaped but are of the darkest black, and move very quickly. Shadows can be exceptionally malicious - carving out meticulous and deceitful plans who harm the living in any way possible.
Ghast - Ghasts are dead murders or those who took delight in unchecked violence. They appear as slightly dessicated dead that move with frightening speed and determination. Ghast will fly into a berserk rage in combat, leaping unto victims and ripping them apart with nails and teeth. Ghast have an innate cleverness but lack the comprehension for elaborate plans or motives. They are mostly driven to murder and violence with little thought to anything else.
Wraith - Wraiths are nearly insubstantial, and are the undead apparitions of those who killed themselves. They have given their bodies away through suicide and so linger in a mournful state that barely exists. Their presence brings forth despair and lonely emotions of all those in the area, and they consume anything joyous or vivacious around them leaving nothing left. Wraiths eventually drive the living near by insane, but are difficult to thwart in their near-invisibility state and lack of need to do conflict.
Mummy - Mummies are the remains of exploiters of their fellow people. This most often includes tyrannical rulers or others that were in positions of abusive power over others. They usually remain in the state which their body was placed. Maggots, vermin, insects or excrement form where ever they step - which represents the words they speak. Mummies seek power and exploitation and often control skeletons and zombies.
Vampire - Vampires are those which fed on the sorrow of others; opportunistic dealers of vice or sorrow. and deceivers who brutally harmed others for their own gain. these often include barrators, nobles, or authority figures which took advantage of others with no regard for their being. Vampires are very much the blood-sucking undead of lore, but also have dark hands which drip of sticky tar - this represents the sticky fingers and dark secrets which they fed upon. Vampires can occasionally hide their undead nature with ample clothing.
Ghost - Ghost are the worst of thieves or those who engaged in deceitful skulduggery. They have no substance and can not act upon anything. Ghosts loose their very identity, which occasionally gets lost onto the living. Ghosts, nearly invisible can wreck much havoc before being driven away if their personality is lost unto a living person.
Spectre- Spectres are falsifiers and frauds who have betrayed their core beliefs; either their liege, faith or those who trusted them. These undead are dessicated corpses burned black from cold, all except their head which remains perfectly preserved. Spectres deal in whispers, lies, and falsifying items. Spectres take joy in breaking the faith or trust in others, and relish in the chaotic aftermath. Spectres can occasionally hide their undead nature with ample clothing.
Lich - Liches are sorcerers, astrologers, and false prophets of malefic intent. Many have there have their heads twisted around on their bodies backward, so that they found it necessary to walk backward because they could not see ahead of them. Liches continue to decay, even in their undeath until they become dust. Some decrepit Magic-Users intentionally place themselves in this state to gain more power, for it is said to be the only true way to learn black magic.
Orcus - Orcus is a unique being, an undead blight. Others may exist like him, but they are unknown. Orcus, the lord of the dead, was once a mortal who personally affronted the great Deity in an unknown but apparently most dire manner. Because of his unknown crime, he was deemed to languish in a state of perpetual and horrific torment. Orcus appears as a crushed and mutilated body, like a piece of half-eaten food that is constantly being chewed up, some-what reconstituted and chewed up again. His pitiable wails and other unwholesome noises drive any sane being away from him. All animals flee from him. Any vulnerable dead who hear this noise, rise and then flee.
The Dead - Dead which are both faithful and buried on consecrated ground will never rise from the dead. If the consecrated ground is somehow marred or tainted, this is no longer true. The dead which are not buried on consecrated ground are vulnerable. The dead of the sinful are likewise vulnerable, although consecrated ground makes it significantly less likely they would rise. The sinful who are not buried on consecrated ground are very vulnerable, and this chance goes up the more horrible their crimes. Lastly, those murdered or slay themselves are also vulnerable.
So, clerics, priest and their acolytes definitely make it a priority to firstly consecrate holy ground and bury their dead therein. Otherwise bad things can happen, especially if you have some real bastards among your population. Site of mass battles are especially vulnerable considering the amount of violence was wrought and the likelihood of lost or forgotten bodies - or simply mass graves or otherwise desecrated remains. All a prime site of dead rising.
Consecrated ground, just like consecrated water, can harm undead. Most will not cross consecrated soil, but some of the exceedingly powerful undead can make a save vs Death to do so. Consecrated ground, even a handful, will harm undead if they touch it, 1hp per round. A Cleric's weapon can likewise be consecrated by himself to deal 1 extra point of damage to undead. Consecrated holy water is even more potent (as holy water rules). Consecrated relics are more potent still, especially in the hands of the person who consecrated it (turn undead rules).
Now for the actual undead:
Zombies / Skeletons - Skeletons and Zombies are more or less identical, but in different stages of decay. Zombies are Skeletons are the unwilling undead. That is, not particularly evil individual that have been made unto walking undead to serve a higher (evil) will. The bodies are unwilling, and so are forced into action that is not of their nature - and so their awkward and lumbering movements appear forced and strained. These undead are soulless vessels however will obey their master's will without question. (ie, slow zombies)
All undead after this point forward are the sinful dead and considerable more dangerous. Unlike the unwilling dead above, they do not hold back, and move quickly with deliberate determination (ie, fast zombies). These undead do have souls; often twisted, evil and malicious.
Ghoul - Ghouls are the remains of carnal malefactors. Those who went to extremes of lust or gluttony and now seek out the most perverse pleasures or to eat the most decrepit of things (with peoples on top of their list). They usually appear as they died - a corpse in the beginning stages of decay, smelling of rot, dirt stained with perhaps a seeping wound or noose around the neck.
Wight - Wights are the remains of the extremely avaricious or miserly (including many previous holy-men). Wights are distorted versions of their previous lives. They often have overly large hands, tongues or skin that is sloughing off of their body. All Wights drag around huge sack of what which they desire - usually heavy coins but sometimes other things such as small children. Wights attack viciously those who have more of what they desire (wealth, belongings, youth, beauty and so forth). They will ignore those who appear to have nothing that they want.Shadow - Shadows are those that found no joy in life or god. They exist two dimensionally and are horribly wrathful beings who spite everyone and everything. They are humanoid shaped but are of the darkest black, and move very quickly. Shadows can be exceptionally malicious - carving out meticulous and deceitful plans who harm the living in any way possible.
Ghast - Ghasts are dead murders or those who took delight in unchecked violence. They appear as slightly dessicated dead that move with frightening speed and determination. Ghast will fly into a berserk rage in combat, leaping unto victims and ripping them apart with nails and teeth. Ghast have an innate cleverness but lack the comprehension for elaborate plans or motives. They are mostly driven to murder and violence with little thought to anything else.
Wraith - Wraiths are nearly insubstantial, and are the undead apparitions of those who killed themselves. They have given their bodies away through suicide and so linger in a mournful state that barely exists. Their presence brings forth despair and lonely emotions of all those in the area, and they consume anything joyous or vivacious around them leaving nothing left. Wraiths eventually drive the living near by insane, but are difficult to thwart in their near-invisibility state and lack of need to do conflict.
Mummy - Mummies are the remains of exploiters of their fellow people. This most often includes tyrannical rulers or others that were in positions of abusive power over others. They usually remain in the state which their body was placed. Maggots, vermin, insects or excrement form where ever they step - which represents the words they speak. Mummies seek power and exploitation and often control skeletons and zombies.
Vampire - Vampires are those which fed on the sorrow of others; opportunistic dealers of vice or sorrow. and deceivers who brutally harmed others for their own gain. these often include barrators, nobles, or authority figures which took advantage of others with no regard for their being. Vampires are very much the blood-sucking undead of lore, but also have dark hands which drip of sticky tar - this represents the sticky fingers and dark secrets which they fed upon. Vampires can occasionally hide their undead nature with ample clothing.
Ghost - Ghost are the worst of thieves or those who engaged in deceitful skulduggery. They have no substance and can not act upon anything. Ghosts loose their very identity, which occasionally gets lost onto the living. Ghosts, nearly invisible can wreck much havoc before being driven away if their personality is lost unto a living person.
Spectre- Spectres are falsifiers and frauds who have betrayed their core beliefs; either their liege, faith or those who trusted them. These undead are dessicated corpses burned black from cold, all except their head which remains perfectly preserved. Spectres deal in whispers, lies, and falsifying items. Spectres take joy in breaking the faith or trust in others, and relish in the chaotic aftermath. Spectres can occasionally hide their undead nature with ample clothing.
Lich - Liches are sorcerers, astrologers, and false prophets of malefic intent. Many have there have their heads twisted around on their bodies backward, so that they found it necessary to walk backward because they could not see ahead of them. Liches continue to decay, even in their undeath until they become dust. Some decrepit Magic-Users intentionally place themselves in this state to gain more power, for it is said to be the only true way to learn black magic.
Orcus - Orcus is a unique being, an undead blight. Others may exist like him, but they are unknown. Orcus, the lord of the dead, was once a mortal who personally affronted the great Deity in an unknown but apparently most dire manner. Because of his unknown crime, he was deemed to languish in a state of perpetual and horrific torment. Orcus appears as a crushed and mutilated body, like a piece of half-eaten food that is constantly being chewed up, some-what reconstituted and chewed up again. His pitiable wails and other unwholesome noises drive any sane being away from him. All animals flee from him. Any vulnerable dead who hear this noise, rise and then flee.
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Birthright Maps
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| Plain |
 | ||||
| With Provinces |
 | |
| With Provinces & Text |
Anyhow, it is all in good fun and I can assure I am exaggerating on the race baiting and chaos. The thing that strikes me the most is the setting is usually starts exactly the same. Same realm, same regents (usually), same tensions, same dichotomy between war and peace. Yet every game is quite different in actual play. Imagine Star Wars if you had different actors and the script was malleable. Al Pachino as Han Solo (which he almost did incidentally).. well that would change the story quite a bit now wouldn't it. He would freaking go out like Scarface before he even left Mos Eisley.
I babble.. back to maps. After looking at the same maps for 10 years, I decided to work up a few, enjoy. Click for larger. The Europeans made me put the distance in metric in the last map - commies.
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
FEAST!
So here is some feast-fluff:
BEST FOOD/DRINK AVAILABLE, D20
Description of average meal followed by max cost. City/village size should adjust this roll appropriately.
1. Pond water and skimmed algae. Pile of unidentifiable ocher paste. 1c
2. Pies made out of deer waste and yeast. Wilting celery with celery paste. Milky water. 2c
3. Goat hooves marinated in brine. Boiled water. Wheat stalks with beeswax. 3c
4. Beet gelatin on flatbread. Soaked pine-cones with melon drippings. Clean water. 5c
5. Small, whole fishes cooked with onions and raisins. Water with mint. Hard grainy bread. 8c
6. Cored pears baked with an egg. Oil and pepper soup with live fish swimming within. Root grog. 1s
7. Salted corn husks filled with leeks with apricots. Hard and dark baked bread. Saltwater grog. 2s
8. Green and Banian bean soaking in buttered milk. Grape leaves and oil, salted and spiced. Mustard rum. 3s
9. Pine kernels mixed with minced eggs and cabbage. Soup with chicken feathers, carrots and broth. Coriander and dill laced ale. 4s
10. Ginger, dates and pine nuts with cooked groats. Stew with spiced potatoes, goat broth and corn. Ale, mead or grog. 5s
11. Lamb cutlets in liebstoeckl, baked with cumin. Fresh green beans with mussels and hazelnuts. Ale, mead, wine or grog. 8s
12. Peasant half with corned biscuits. Vinegar egg-yolks with apples. Fine stew with chicken, mixed vegetables and spices. Ale, mead, wine, rum, brandy or grog. 1g
13. Crab with honeyed-potatoes. Rue with flatbread and thyme. Peppered chowder with shrimp and vigaments. Hard cheese as desired. Ale, mead, beer, wine, rum, brandy or grog. 2g
14. Mutton filled-grape rolls with lard and anise seed. Mashed beans with lentils, sweet peas, chickpeas with a slide of oil and olives. Stout Ale, mead, beer, wine, port, rum, brandy or grog. 3g
15. Skewered hare with pomegranates. Dried figs with sugar. Beechnuts and cabbage. Fine cheese with white bread. Stout Ale, mead, beer, wine, port, rum, brandy, barleywine or grog. 5g
16. Whole grilled piglet or Kobold tail stuffed with salt, vinegar and grass peas. Fine cheese melted over flat bread with tomatoes and garlic. Sturgeon soup with sardines and white wine base. Stout Ale, metheglin mead, beer, wine, port, rum, cider, gin, brandy, barleywine . 20g
17. Buttered beef rack with ewe cheese and salted plantains. Giant Ant soup in sweet oil and bay leaves. Svirneblin cake with raisins. Fruit brandy, metheglin mead, beer, wine, port, rum, cider, gin, or barleywine . 100g
18. Baked song-birds or Stirges perched on the snout of a swordfish. Marinated eels in goose yokes and pine nuts (eel numbs the tongue). Herbed bisque of tuna and mulliten. Fruit brandy, absinthe, mead, beer, wine, port, rum, cider, gin, or barleywine . 250g
19. Basilisk or Gryphon rack spiced with the finest of herbs, served in a tame mimic. Black pudding pudding sweetened with black sugar and cinnamon. Dragon-turtle soup with sliced shreakers and shallots. Fruit brandy, absinthe, sparkling wine, Grig milk, port, rum, cider, Violet Fungus liquor, or barleywine . 2,500g
20. Phoenix stuffed with persimmons that mews when eaten – heated under an enslaved fire mephit. Owlbear digits and gold-leafed Bulette fins marinated in sweetened figs and Sylph tears. Mermaid larvae soup, trussed with Naga milk and Couatl oil. Fruit brandy, absinthe, sparkling wine, distilled broken dreams, palm wine, port, Grig milk, cider, Bailigin (purple worm vomit), or barleywine - in cups that walk to the drinker. 5,000g+
BEST REVELING COMPANION(S) AVAILABLE D20
Charisma modified may adjust this if applicable
1. A mostly dead leper who lost his lower jaw. He only emits pitiable moans.
2. A vagrant old man who will agree to revel if you promise to dig him a grave
3. A one-armed gnome who enjoys pulling out your arm-hair at awkward times
4. Orphans who continually beg for food and shoes
5. A yellow stripped cat with human-like eyes that draws woman with its pristine coat
6. A runt of an Ogre that is fond of throwing people out of windows
7. Sausage vendor with nothing better to do, always carries a sausage in one hand
8. Lost foreign diplomat who does not speak the local language, assumes you are the leader of the people
9. An animated stool which follows you around
10. Group of sailors who keep calling you ‘lumb nips’
11. A parrot which speaks curses and returns occasionally with money and discrete articles of clothing
12. A disguised kobold who somehow came into riches and looks to you on how to properly spend it
13. Bunta, beautiful barbarian woman who attempts to slay any other female who gets too close to you
14. Cult of albino Elves in pure white robes out for a night on the town – they apparently know many hidden where the finest mild altering drugs are sold
15. A Halfling riding a large basset hound who serves drinks with a ladle and a bucket
16. Noble with a heavy purse, wishing merely to hear your tales which later becomes a best selling novel
17. Three dwarf-lords with a trove of treasure wanting an exotic drinking companion for the evening
18. Infatuated theater troupe who sings a theme song where ever you go
19. School of Magical Arts for young ladies from ages 16 to 24 whose tyrannical school mistress recently perished while on a study abroad trip
20. Throgginor the Great Debaucher, high priest of missing nights – on the greatest holy day for his religion of the millennium.
ORDINARY EVENTS D20
As applicable
1. You get lost in your revelry and find a new wondrous location in the city
2. In your revelry you board the wrong ship/ wagon/ coach/ inn room
3. Accidentally buy stolen goods (50% of being noticed with them)
4. Stray cat or dog follows you and occasionally begs for food
5. New romance with local dalliance
6. Foolish behavior marks you with the local arbiters who track your movements
7. 1d6 new enemies
8. 1d6 new loyal friends
9. New habit; beverage, drug or gambling
10. New retaining or hireling
11. Friends make utter fool of you while you are passed out
12. Massive bar fight! 3d20 participate in a melee with non lethal weapons. 6d100g in damage is incurred
13. Minor bar fight! 1d6 participants in a melee with non lethal weapons. 1d100g in damages
14. Gambling binge, roll a 1d6. If you roll a 1, gain 1d1000g. Otherwise loose 1d1000g.
15. Beaten and robbed, loose any obvious gold and jewels on your person
16. New Tattoo, random location and type
17. Romantic misunderstanding, gain a new (unwanted) romance
18. Criminal misunderstanding, you are now in jail for a minor offense (1d4 weeks or 1d100g)
19. Class misunderstanding, you are now in jail for insulting a noble (1d4 weeks or 1d100g)
20. No ordinary hangover, you gain -2 to all rolls for 1d4 days
ODD EVENTS D20
Should the DM wish things to indeed be eventful..
1. Man flees the outhouse screaming of a monster living therein (a very upset Dryad who has awoken from her hibernation )
2. Food is served from a municipal jar with imbues a sense of insight and focus you have never felt. Guests form a symposium who drink and speak of philosophy and grand questions. A new government or spiritual movement is formed that night with you as the leader.
3. Colored powder is tossed from reveler to reveler – traditionally thought to ward infertility away. Most all revelers are coated head to toe in yellows, purples, blues and so forth.
4. Local revelers engage in constant eye-gazing, fixating one person for an hour or more staring into their eyes without talking. You are unable to lie after this for 1d4 weeks.
5. Establishment owner dies clutching his chest. Looking straight at you, he wills the establishment to you with his last breath – while his entire family looks on in horror.
6. You see yourself walk into the establishment, order a drink and speak to some travelers. When you approach ‘you’ their face quickly changes in a sickly fluid manner into another person’s face. (doppelganger)
7. You and your friends awaken on a ship of cat-people who enslave you dance and juggle at their hidden and bizarre tent-city
8. Local priest enter the establishment and declare it a holy day of hedonism and demand an immediate mass-orgy. Priests sprinkle flowers on participants. (PCs can flee)
9. You find a finger bone in your rum. If you search out the source, you find the ancient cask which was recently opened and if searched, a full skeleton inside. A rum-soaked map is jammed down the skeleton’s throat. The map is of a hidden isle to the far south east.
10. A patrol of baboons enter the establishment in a berserk flurry. They grab throw a rock at your head that is inscribed with a time and place. The baboons then flee.
11. You awaken on a giant turtle who calmly floats in a pond. On the far side of the pond is a massive ruin of stone buildings mashed between two huge standing boulders. You can find your way home in 1d6 days but are only able to find your way back if you map it meticulously.
12. A moose walk into the establishment and eats from your plate. It is in no rush to leave. It will let you use it as a mount, although it never runs faster than a canter.
13. It begins to rain with a thick mist. When the mist clears the establishment is in another city far, far away.
14. A Halfing slices your hamstring with a deadly sharp dagger (1d6 dmg, ½ move for 1 week) and says, “Whoas-hit! Wrong Human!” and he scampers off, “Sorry!”.
15. A black pudding has awoken and attacks through various cracks and crevasses from the floor boards of the establishment. At first small animals are wrenched through areas of the floor, then people.
16. You awaken in a field surrounded by mushrooms and large toads. A smallish toad lifts a flower by the stem and croaks loudly, and all of the toads bow to you. Every now and then when you camp in the wilderness you find regurgitated fish and berries by your pillow.
17. A Bard screams loudly after drinking the mead and begins to peel away his flesh. In 1d4 rounds he turns into a zombie and mindlessly attacks patrons. Anyone damaged likewise turns into a zombie and is likewise contagious.
18. A man in a hood enters the establishment, calmly walks behind someone and slits their throat, slaying them. No one appears to notice except you. You notice his hands are like tiger-paws.
19. You happen to look under the tables at the establishment and see a very large slug under each table. If you harm or disturb one, everyone in the establishment enters into an insane and berserk fury.
20. You awaken on a flying Pegasus, nude, with someone’s severed head in one hand and banner of unknown origin in the other.
Sunday, August 8, 2010
Free Adventure Sunday - Thunderdelve Mines
So, enter Thunderdelve Mines. I admit it is a bit campy, but with the length of good solid campigning in B10, I do not see that as a bad thing. Side note, I stole the name from an (unremarkable) model I owned as a kid, Thunderdelve Mountain.
Download here, 200k pdf.
Thursday, August 5, 2010
The Land of Rabbits
In the western most reaches of the Lodoga lay the Durns of Laskemma, a charmed land of pleasant vales and blue-green pines. Despite its natural beauty, therein lay one of the greatest perils of the west, the Kammarissa, and the raging battles therein. It is here where no men dwell and the animals rise up with unwholesome demeanor.
The Durns of Laskemma were long ago settled by a man rejected by hell who called himself Kammarissa. It was he who built a great mill call Voane, to grind mundane things such as corn, grain and even money into strange and unfathomable vile things in contempt of the world. Kammarissa had indiscernible goals and the great mill ran for decades ceaselessly by using the wildlife to power the mill while he sang. Kammarissa was an eternally malign above all else, and it is here that he played the ten thousand verses of spite that enabled men to betray one another. He played his vile music while the mill ran, most of which was lost to the winds thankfully. The animals which powered the mill however listened and learned - and so many gained unwholesome comprehensions beyond thier peers breed elsewhere.
Kammarissa is still thought to be in the Durns, and it is well known that many of the descendants of the animals he enslaved exist still in prolific numbers. They collectively call themselves the Laskemma, the first name they have known. The rollings hills of the Durns are the home to the Bode Warrens. A group of burrows which are dug by the Usu, semi-intelligent and large rabbits which migrate from warren to warren. They are semi-intelligent, like all creatures in the Durns, and form tight-knit bands for mutual protection. Usu females called does are the prime commodity among their race, and their go to great lengths to protect or gain new ones.
Within the patches of forests dwell the Meerswetch, or pig-coneys, which vie with the Usu in brutal and vicious battles over territory. The Meerswetch warrens are almost always in the pined woodlands, and these are static hole-dwellings rather than the migratory ones of the Usu. As such they are better built with deadfalls, snares and other fortifications to deter intruders. The Meerswetch jealously guard the Voane in the deep reaches of the ancient woods, and treat it as a holy site. They desire things unknown to them as to feed through the Voane, and so they will often stalk interlopers in hopes of stealing unknown objects - or perhaps to feed the interlopers themselves through the mill.
Tormenting both races are long-billed and multi-colored birds who dwell in the deep waters of the few lakes. It is they who cruelly and indiscriminately punish any who are so foolish as to be out of their burrows alone or be caught near the water's edge unprotected. Very few sources of fresh water exist in the Durns and those that do exist are likewise home to the great birds. Collecting water is perhaps one of the most dangerous but nessesary tasks in the Durns.
All of the races in the Durns operate with an intuitive and very clever intelligence. They can use rudimentary tools, but prefer their natural capabilities. They can speak with one another, but no man has ever learned what language they know. Most of the inhabitants are spiteful and vindictive creatures. By in large, they are extremely territorial, superstitious, and xenophobic. Their are some exceptions, but these are rare and usually short lived.
All of these races take their dead to a cork-screw hole in the ground that is a mile across and drills so deep into the earth that one can not see the bottom. It is here, a place unnamed, that Kammarissa himself is thought to dwell. All things which die in the Durns are dropped in to the deeps to a fate unknown.
The Durns are widely avoided by all civilized races. Intruders are beset by one or more of the prime races therein, and ceaselessly assaulted until they perish or flee. Indeed many of the battles from inside the Durns spill over into neighboring lands, causing great strife. It appears that the animosity of the races is at least contained within the Durns, and has not spread to other areas.
- - - -
When I was just out of High school I worked at a local software store and house-watched for one of my neighbors, who happened to be Roy Thomas. Besides being an absurdly brilliant individual, his house was eclectic to say the least. Every wall had scores of original art work from the silver age on up, a library of thousands upon thousands of book, and many many pets.
Indoors lived 6-7 birds, Toucans which tried to maul me at every opportunity, and wicked parrots as well. All ill-tempered and loyal only to their dark master. In fact I think he liked them vicious. The backyard was a landscape of two burrows, a trench around them both, with areas filled with water. One barrow was for rabbits, the other for guinea pigs. Geese patrolled outside of this area with a few ducks too. All of whom absolutely loathed one another.
I watched his house for a few weeks while Roy and his wife went on his many road trips. I had to bribe the Toucans with grapes to even get in the door and the parrots I simply had to keep caged for my own safety. The outdoor animals were quite curious of me at first - but when they got comfortable they when about their own routine - all out war. The rabbits and guinea pigs were the main aggressors. They would group up in large numbers and attack stragglers of the other side; the young, old and weak being the primary targets. Occasionally they would form small groups, running into the other's burrows and dragging out a lone victim, and proceed to chew the hell out of them. The high pitched squeal is something I will never forget, and this noise called for aid from their kin. Soon it broke out into an all-out melee, rabbits and guinea pigs running about all over the place in a brutal free for all. Sometimes one would be unfortunate enough to be dragged outside of the burrows and past the trenches, and that is where the geese would lay into them with unrelenting beaks that apparently never let go. The ducks were smart enough to stay the hell away from all of this and usually sat in the middle of the small ponds. As the only source of drinking water, they viciously protected it and would not hesitate to drag a bunny by the ear to a watery grave.
In all Roy must have had 25 or 30 of each rabbits and guinea pigs. They did breed but the population size stayed the same for the few years that I lived near him. Many perished in the great burrow wars but oddly enough I never saw a body. Even the ones that I knew drowned in the water were apparently retrieved and placed.. somewhere. Maybe eaten, maybe placed in some dark and deep burrow for the lost, who knows.
This was all rather traumatic for a kid who previously had the most loving pets possible. I admit I would be lying if I did not think it was also morbidly fascinating. More so because Roy would go onto his back porch in the morning, sit in a lounge chair and drink his coffee while reading some Lovecraftian book that no one ever heard of. All the while this bloody and vicious war was occurring as a trifle for his unnoticed pleasure.
Obviously Roys's personal little ecosystem is a trove of ideas to plunder. Considering how strange real-life is in this case, I feel that no fantasy write up can really do it justice.
The Durns of Laskemma were long ago settled by a man rejected by hell who called himself Kammarissa. It was he who built a great mill call Voane, to grind mundane things such as corn, grain and even money into strange and unfathomable vile things in contempt of the world. Kammarissa had indiscernible goals and the great mill ran for decades ceaselessly by using the wildlife to power the mill while he sang. Kammarissa was an eternally malign above all else, and it is here that he played the ten thousand verses of spite that enabled men to betray one another. He played his vile music while the mill ran, most of which was lost to the winds thankfully. The animals which powered the mill however listened and learned - and so many gained unwholesome comprehensions beyond thier peers breed elsewhere.
Kammarissa is still thought to be in the Durns, and it is well known that many of the descendants of the animals he enslaved exist still in prolific numbers. They collectively call themselves the Laskemma, the first name they have known. The rollings hills of the Durns are the home to the Bode Warrens. A group of burrows which are dug by the Usu, semi-intelligent and large rabbits which migrate from warren to warren. They are semi-intelligent, like all creatures in the Durns, and form tight-knit bands for mutual protection. Usu females called does are the prime commodity among their race, and their go to great lengths to protect or gain new ones.
Tormenting both races are long-billed and multi-colored birds who dwell in the deep waters of the few lakes. It is they who cruelly and indiscriminately punish any who are so foolish as to be out of their burrows alone or be caught near the water's edge unprotected. Very few sources of fresh water exist in the Durns and those that do exist are likewise home to the great birds. Collecting water is perhaps one of the most dangerous but nessesary tasks in the Durns.
All of the races in the Durns operate with an intuitive and very clever intelligence. They can use rudimentary tools, but prefer their natural capabilities. They can speak with one another, but no man has ever learned what language they know. Most of the inhabitants are spiteful and vindictive creatures. By in large, they are extremely territorial, superstitious, and xenophobic. Their are some exceptions, but these are rare and usually short lived.
All of these races take their dead to a cork-screw hole in the ground that is a mile across and drills so deep into the earth that one can not see the bottom. It is here, a place unnamed, that Kammarissa himself is thought to dwell. All things which die in the Durns are dropped in to the deeps to a fate unknown.
The Durns are widely avoided by all civilized races. Intruders are beset by one or more of the prime races therein, and ceaselessly assaulted until they perish or flee. Indeed many of the battles from inside the Durns spill over into neighboring lands, causing great strife. It appears that the animosity of the races is at least contained within the Durns, and has not spread to other areas.
- - - -
When I was just out of High school I worked at a local software store and house-watched for one of my neighbors, who happened to be Roy Thomas. Besides being an absurdly brilliant individual, his house was eclectic to say the least. Every wall had scores of original art work from the silver age on up, a library of thousands upon thousands of book, and many many pets.
Indoors lived 6-7 birds, Toucans which tried to maul me at every opportunity, and wicked parrots as well. All ill-tempered and loyal only to their dark master. In fact I think he liked them vicious. The backyard was a landscape of two burrows, a trench around them both, with areas filled with water. One barrow was for rabbits, the other for guinea pigs. Geese patrolled outside of this area with a few ducks too. All of whom absolutely loathed one another.
I watched his house for a few weeks while Roy and his wife went on his many road trips. I had to bribe the Toucans with grapes to even get in the door and the parrots I simply had to keep caged for my own safety. The outdoor animals were quite curious of me at first - but when they got comfortable they when about their own routine - all out war. The rabbits and guinea pigs were the main aggressors. They would group up in large numbers and attack stragglers of the other side; the young, old and weak being the primary targets. Occasionally they would form small groups, running into the other's burrows and dragging out a lone victim, and proceed to chew the hell out of them. The high pitched squeal is something I will never forget, and this noise called for aid from their kin. Soon it broke out into an all-out melee, rabbits and guinea pigs running about all over the place in a brutal free for all. Sometimes one would be unfortunate enough to be dragged outside of the burrows and past the trenches, and that is where the geese would lay into them with unrelenting beaks that apparently never let go. The ducks were smart enough to stay the hell away from all of this and usually sat in the middle of the small ponds. As the only source of drinking water, they viciously protected it and would not hesitate to drag a bunny by the ear to a watery grave.
In all Roy must have had 25 or 30 of each rabbits and guinea pigs. They did breed but the population size stayed the same for the few years that I lived near him. Many perished in the great burrow wars but oddly enough I never saw a body. Even the ones that I knew drowned in the water were apparently retrieved and placed.. somewhere. Maybe eaten, maybe placed in some dark and deep burrow for the lost, who knows.
 | |
| He will ~jack~ you up unless you have grapes |
Obviously Roys's personal little ecosystem is a trove of ideas to plunder. Considering how strange real-life is in this case, I feel that no fantasy write up can really do it justice.
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Paper Art
Cutting the paper was maybe an hour. Laying and cleaning the Plexi, maybe 20 minutes. The real problem was the frame - I had to build my own since 6 sheets of Plexi is something like 30 pounds. Building the frame took far more time and effort than anything else, so, I probably will not be doing too many more of these.
Next time (if their is a next time), instead of construction paper, it would be much easier to cut vinyl, although would be worried of an overly plastic feel. Also I think it would be better to not clean the Plexi, and even slightly dust it to really give the feeling of depth. Several people have looked at the peice and did not even notice it was in solid Plexi at all, but thought it simply free-floating paper.Anyhow, if I happen to get renewed interest I think it would be good to try a dungeon map with 4-5 levels stacked, but with enough viewable area to see all of the layers as they lower and lower. Tricky perhaps, but something that would look excellent if it was decent executed.
Monday, August 2, 2010
All good things.. rise from the dead and make no morale check
So, it has been a little over a year and the initial Valley of Blue Snails campaign is now complete. I think I can consider it a success considering my esteemed cousin survived his tour in Iraq with (relative) sanity intact and managed to almost reach level 3 in the process. So a quick review of the game from my point of view:
The Good:
A Giant Segmented Worm that spewed burning dirt-feces
A hireling who grew a lemur tail when the PC's Oculus power was used in an inadvisable location
Lord Maulden, who was bewitched by one of the users of the Occulus, was reduced to doing nothing but eating, fucking and sleeping in luxury. The question arose if anyone would really be doing him a favor by 'freeing' him, lol.
Using a giant (dead) nautilus,I got to reenact this scene:
The Bad:
Using Gmail exclusively to run it
We almost concluded the intro adventure in one year's time..
The Traumatic Childhood Background Generator is perhaps too traumatic
The Fighter's cleave on those under 1hd is enormously powerful
The Ugly:
Trying to track down names and details I invented 8 months prior
Find out that I am senile since I can't remember this crap
All in all, not too bad. My main complaint was the difficulty in turn-around time for play. I seriously think we could have accomplished the same game-play in 2-3 nights of in-person play. Cest la vie.
As for this blog, I will likely post again here and there as I have time. I enjoy the creativity exercises and a few folks have found some of it useful. I may eventually write up a short story or two set in the Valley of Blue Snails world. A few ideas have crossed my mind in the last year that I would like to put in writing. Further development of the campaign setting will be incidental and instead I will focus on being unfocused - generally blurting out what game related non-sense comes to mind.
At the moment we are playing Villains and Vigilantes. My PC is El Gato, a fat and old luchador wrestler that is a bit of a combination between Ron Jeremy and a Spanish Ric Flair. He has one stat above a 9 and he has to change luchador masks to use any powers worth a crap. The campaign is set in an alternate Las Vegas and our team's secret hideout is El Gato's run-down trailer parked in back of some seedy casino. Great fun.
The Good:
A Giant Segmented Worm that spewed burning dirt-feces
A hireling who grew a lemur tail when the PC's Oculus power was used in an inadvisable location
Lord Maulden, who was bewitched by one of the users of the Occulus, was reduced to doing nothing but eating, fucking and sleeping in luxury. The question arose if anyone would really be doing him a favor by 'freeing' him, lol.
Using a giant (dead) nautilus,I got to reenact this scene:
The Bad:
Using Gmail exclusively to run it
We almost concluded the intro adventure in one year's time..
The Traumatic Childhood Background Generator is perhaps too traumatic
The Fighter's cleave on those under 1hd is enormously powerful
The Ugly:
Trying to track down names and details I invented 8 months prior
Find out that I am senile since I can't remember this crap
All in all, not too bad. My main complaint was the difficulty in turn-around time for play. I seriously think we could have accomplished the same game-play in 2-3 nights of in-person play. Cest la vie.
As for this blog, I will likely post again here and there as I have time. I enjoy the creativity exercises and a few folks have found some of it useful. I may eventually write up a short story or two set in the Valley of Blue Snails world. A few ideas have crossed my mind in the last year that I would like to put in writing. Further development of the campaign setting will be incidental and instead I will focus on being unfocused - generally blurting out what game related non-sense comes to mind.
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
Erol Otus Art Challenge
I entered in the Erol Otus Art Challenge and picked up two honorable mentions (and free loot as well). It is rather strange to have an iconical artist of D&D give your chicken scratch a look over and give a nod. This certainly exceeded my expectations and I am quite pleased.
4-5 of the entries were spot-on works for the Erol Otus era of D&D art and I look forward to the enlarged versions when they post them. I recommend taking a loot.
As a general update, I changed jobs and am also contracting at my old job. Thus the cobwebs and crickets. This project is in the 'dry polish' stage so there is not much to post anyhow. My cousin who is going to Iraq is visiting in a few days and we will likely give Valley of Blue Snails a playtest and I will make the appropriate changes. It is certianly playable now but who knows what will change after we actually play the damn thing. I am sure I will update after such.
4-5 of the entries were spot-on works for the Erol Otus era of D&D art and I look forward to the enlarged versions when they post them. I recommend taking a loot.
As a general update, I changed jobs and am also contracting at my old job. Thus the cobwebs and crickets. This project is in the 'dry polish' stage so there is not much to post anyhow. My cousin who is going to Iraq is visiting in a few days and we will likely give Valley of Blue Snails a playtest and I will make the appropriate changes. It is certianly playable now but who knows what will change after we actually play the damn thing. I am sure I will update after such.
Friday, April 17, 2009
You spy your long time love laying eggs in the wilderness one evening
These tables really have nothing to do with B/X or Valley of Blue Snails. Rather just anecdotal write-ups for my own amusement. I am fond of random tables, probably a side effect of growing up with AD&D.
Anyhow, this is the follow up to the traumatic childhood background generator. Onwards to the Traumatic Adolescent Background Generator:
COMELINESS 3d6
New ability score deriving physical appearance, roll 3d6. Discard this ability score at the end of adolescence. The memory will always haunt you however.
3 – Exiled from the village for being not of your race
4 – Ruthlessly tormented and forced to wear bag over head
5 – Beaten at random intervals for no apparent reason
6-8 – Brought along by your good-looking friends to stand next too
8-11 – Non-descript and utterly forgettable
12-14 - 1 in d4 chance to have a stalker (roll on Hirelings table)
15-16 – 1-3 in d4 chance to have a stalker (roll on Hirelings table)
17 – Ritualistically beaten by far uglier peers and family
18 – Extremely paranoid from lurid looks and random gropings from entire village
TEMPORARY WISDOM MODIFIER d6
The Wisdom for an adolescent can never be above 12. If the modified Wisdom is 0 or under, it is assumed the PC has gotten themselves killed in a spectacularly stupid manner.
1 – minus 6 (permanent injury incurred caused by lack of wisdom)
2 – minus 5 (temporary injury incurred caused by lack of wisdom)
3 – minus 4 (several scars caused by lack of wisdom)
4 – minus 3
5 – minus 2
6 – minus 1 (remarkably unscarred)
HIRELINGS d20
Aka – gullible friends. They will be available as future hirelings. Roll once unless your Charisma modifier is 0 (then you have no friends).
1 – An ill-tempered marmot capable of using tools but can not speak
2 – Friend of opposite sex, extremely attractive with no interest in you what-so-ever
3 – Lost Ogre who stays in the woods, friendly because you bring him small furry animals
4 – Disguised Fey creature entertaining himself for a few years
5 – Friend of same race, exact same interests, skills and traumas
6 – Friend of the same race, wholly inept
7 – A completely innocent, pure, and gullible friend of the same race
8 – Friend of the same race, who is better than you at just about everything
9 – A hopping bird with a smug look on its face
10 – Friend of different race, wholly inept
11 –The lone survivor of a decadent and extinct race
12 – Friend of different race, who is better than you at just about everything
13 – Some old hermit that follows you around
14 – A colony of lepers
15 – A dog that never stops barking
16 – A foreigner who can not speak your language but is remarkably loyal.
17 – The village retard with freakish strength
18 – Young orphan kid with a knack of finding snares and traps
19 – A blood-crazed and insane Knight who calls you ‘liege’
20 – A half-man half-cat that hides in your addict. Howls incessantly at the moon.
ACADEMIA d12
‘Trade skill’ is any knowledge applicable towards making a living. Fishing, begging, carpentry, pick pocketing, flogging, scribing, hole-digging, and so forth. Roll once.
1 – PC incapable of learning anything useful (hence their future career as adventurer)
2 – Trade skill learned but turns out to be wholly inept in any application
3 – Single trade skill learned and mastered
4-5 – No trade skills learned, but cursory knowledge of a great many things
6-8 – Two trade skills learned and re-roll (ignore 1)
9-10 – Two trade skills learned
11-12 – Single trade skilled learned
LANGUAGES d12
Roll as many times as your Intelligence language modifier allows (0-3 times usually). Player or DM choose the language they wish to learn, results below.
1 – Gibberish, the language was made up by a hard-up or insane instructor
2 – Language learned, but different language than intended
3 – Language learned with strangely alluring dialect
4-5 – Language learned and mastered with fluency as if born with it
6-8 – Language learned remedially, many words have entirely different meaning than what you think they do
9-10 – Language can be written and read, but unable to pronounce
11 – Language learned, and can understand all similar languages
12 –Language learned with annoying and irritating dialect
TRAUMATIC ADOLESCENT EVENTS d12
Count the number of odd dice rolls thus far. Roll on this table that many times (1-5 usually).
1 – Re-roll twice and combine the events. Ignore 1.
2 – Re-roll. You learn an appropriate trade skill from applicable event.
3-5 – Horror Event
6-8 – Romance Event
9-11 – Adventure Event
12 – Weird/Other Event
HORROR EVENT d20
1 – Head stuck in a hole in ground for 1d8 days. Something licks your legs periodically during your entrapment.
2 – Deranged hermit pulling a cart with unidentified meat follows you around at night for 1d4 years
3 – Walking barnacles abscond 1d4 members of your family and are never seen again
4 – Tawdry and irksome fey spirit prevents you from getting a good nights rest for 1d4 years
5 – Any deceased siblings or family reanimate and haunt your village periodically
6 – Another is blamed for a crime that you commit and is burned on a pyre. A revenant in a twisted amalgam of fire and that person seeks to slay you twice a year
7 – A Kalevope culls the lands around your dwelling once a year, no matter where you live
8 – A priest inadvertently turns you with his turn undead ability. It appears to effect you
9 – Strange ticks grow under you skin and must be burned out lest they multiply
10 – A wingless forest drake smashes your dwelling while you are not home and devours all inside. It used the remaining timbers for its nest
11 – A horrid Nakki drags you into its stagnant pool and forces you to clean the bones of its victims. In 1d6 years you manage to escape with many horrible tales.
12 – A water nymph enslaves you but is utterly boring. You are released 1d4 years later with few tales to tell.
13 – A group of carnivorous ape-men ransack your village leaving you as the only survivor
14 – Nomadic Frog-Yetis encamp near your village causing much horror and strife for 1d6 months. By the time they leave over half of the village is dead or maimed.
15 – You are enslaved by the Carpmen of Raelenac and forced to scrape abalone shells on a Meglo-Coy for 1d4 years before escaping.
16 – A small but playful Trent ensnares your legs in its roots. It does not release you for 1d4 months.
17 – You fall down a sinkhole permeated with the remnants of Vaunderfel, the Great Spring. You age in reverse until reborn into a different being (re-roll stats and race). This occurs within 1d4 months time and none recognize you after.
18 – Desert raiders enslave your village forcing you to act as pack animals. You escape 1d6 years later.
19 – An old and forgotten being of enormous power is released from its bygone prison by your meddling. It promises to repay you someday, searing your mind as it communicates.
20 – While sleeping in the wilderness you get enveloped by a Sky-Shell and live within a pocket of air and fluids inside of the creature for 1d6 months before escaping.
ROMANCE EVENT d20
1 – You have absolutely no romance in your adolescence and are mocked ceaselessly by your peers
2 – Desert raiders abscond you into slavery, forcing you act as a pleasure slave in the profane Ziggurats of the Man-Bull. You are released 1d4 years later. Gain a trade skill.
3 – The sexually frustrated Elf maids from the Village of Two Stars kidnap and fight with one another over mating rituals for 1d4 years. Still unresolved, you eventually escape.
4 – A moonlight date to some abandoned ruins result into running for life from crazed flesh-eating Halflings. Your date has 1 in d4 chance of escaping and naming you hero.
5 – A walk on the shores of nearby lake with your date results in a tribe of intelligent sand-crabs worshiping you both as a god.
6 – A winged fey creature becomes infatuated with you for 1d4 years, following you day and night
7 – Your hireling falls madly in love with you (applicable if you rolled on the hireling table, otherwise re-roll)
8 – You are forced into an arrange marriage by your family, roll for race and birthright of new family
9 – You fall madly in love with a Knights squire. The belligerent Knight hates you at first sight. They quickly travel away but you vow to find them one day (squire can be male or female or any race)
10 – An orphan vagrant falls madly in love you with and follows you around until death
11 – You find a potential mate to be amazingly beautiful and attractive. Everyone else you speak with talks about this person as if they are the ugliest person in the village
12 – The one you love cares not for you. An ancient family text speaks of a mushroom from the Great Rot that will infatuate all who look upon you should you devour it. A map of the location of where these mushrooms can be found are located in the book.
13 – A rival courtier of the one you love challenges you to a duel. You accept and accidentally geld the person. None in the village will be seen with you now.
14 – A wizard/sorceress falls in love you with you and is constantly changing their shape into alluring forms to gain your love.
15 – When finally alone with your date, you inexplicable turn into a fox-beast and attempt to devour them. None believe the tale.
16 – A wayward spirit steals a part of your spirit. You can feel no love nor lust until you retrieve it from them.
17 – You awake one morning married in Astrumdantalas with a mate of ill-repute whom you never recall meeting.
18 – An ogre of the opposite sex finds you and drags you off to their cave. You barely escape the event, but still hear forlorn cries from that area of the wilderness to this day.
19 – You awake most mornings with smallish fey creatures cuddled against you. They leave tiny offerings of flowers, sweet food and perfumes.
20 – You spy your long time love laying eggs in the wilderness one evening.
ADVENTURE EVENT d20
1 – The PC finds a nest with an opal-eyed fox in it. The fox follows the PC around and attempts to remove the skin from my other humanoids its comes across
2 – You follow some singing in the distance and find several of the village females dancing and singing around huge nodding toad. The women flee if confronted, but the toad-thing speaks to you of fantastic adventures to the far south.
3 – You find a pole in the wilds that climbs higher than you see. You climb it as far as you can but it appears to be endless.
4 – While traveling six screaming men run past you with ruined clothing and smoldering hair. One of them drops a half-burned tome that speaks of an underground desert.
5 – A traveling Bard plays a song of a Bard trapped in a keep who is forced to play music to keep an angry tribe of man-eating bears asleep. The next day when you speak of the Bard none know what or who you speak of.
6 – While swimming in a lake you find a large tablet of polished coral. You drag it up the surface and see upon it a miniature city of incredible detail. The city appears to be abandoned but you see tiny sculptures of minuscule shrimp among the coral.
7 – After stealing a shield from a wandering Knight, a magic mouth follows you endlessly insulting you in many strange tongues. A wizard agree to remove the magic mouth, but only if you find him some rare grasses from the Valley of Endless Summer.
8 – A colony of lepers imposes themselves into the center of town unless the PC find them a new home.
9 – The fields of rye turn ashen and start to rot from the ground up. On your land you find a small cave leading under the fields of rye.
10 – As penance for committing an act of heresy, the local Priest-Lord send you on a quest to find an ancient knight an honorable death in combat. He puts emphasis on ‘honorable’. (Gain ancient knight as henchman until he has found an honorable death)
11 – A troupe of Marggots build a carnival some miles away and the village sends you to find out what it is all about.
12 – A fetid and diseased rhino stumbles near your home. When dealing with the creature it vomits a ruby encrusted bracer (value 500g). When worn the PC hears faint chuckling.
13 – A huge flightless birds runs into your dwelling, takes your most valuable possession in its beak and flees and blurring speed. You track it the best you can but you only know it headed towards a thicket of foreboding woods that none enter.
14 – While near a waterfall you think you saw a pair of feline eyes behind it. Exploring behind the water fall you see a crevice that sinks into the depths. You also find a huge discarded cat-claw larger than you are.
15 – While looking for a camping site you come across a meadow with a dozen Dwarves that appear to be sleeping. They all are simply overcome with lethargy and stare upwards. When you look upwards you see a low hanging cloud with a near invisible rope hanging down.
16 – A theater troupe stages a play that insults the local lord. All are due to be executed in a week unless they can make the lord laugh. They are all foreigners who can not speak the native language. Only you can translate for them.
17 – A group of pygmies wearing feather-clothing jumps out as you walk on a road and toss spears at you, some wounding you. When they hear your angry cries they flee up the tall trees. You can see platforms in the high canopy.
18 – A PC is given the deed to a pawn-shop in a nearby city. The store is in complete shambles, vagrants often use it to sleep in, and a crazy dwarf lives in the walls.
19 – A crazed Tyrannosaurus assault your village and you miraculously defeat with legendary bravery and guile. The local lord is so impressed he sends you on mission after mission of nearly suicidal quests.
20 – A half-man half-raccoon stumbles towards you camp, lets out and chattering sound then tosses a pouch of regurgitated seeds in your lap. Before you can respond it flees to a taboo vale that none enter.
WEIRD/OTHER EVENT d20
1 – A fey creature leaves a child at your door step. (if taken) the child grows to adulthood in 1d4 years, looking exactly like you
2 – While working you see a cat standing on a strange pillow that flies above the ground. If followed it eventually lifts off high into the night sky
3 – While in a drunken brawl, a wounded friend appear to be bleeding water. When closely inspected they flee. When met the following day they pass it off as you being drunk
4 – A sullen painter asks you to pose for a portrait. After a few hours he starts screaming and runs off never to be seen again. The painting is of you sitting upon a bronze throne with ruby-eyed imps prostrating themselves at your feet
5 – You find a Cudgel like weapon wrought from fossilized wood embedded in the side of a hill The Cudgel is larger than your dwelling
6 – Your friend swears on his life that he saw the chair in his room beat the snot out of his table. His table appears to be in shambles and the chair looks remarkably smug
7 – When coming home one day you find a group of six trilobites carrying your (most valuable possession) under your dwelling
8 – A saber-tooth cat will periodically jump on your back out of no where, give you a quick mauling, and then scamper off leaving only superficial wounds
9 – After bathing in a small pond of tranquil and serene water your notice your hair is remarkably full, flowing and vibrant. It grows quickly past your shoulders and the slightest wind bellows it heroically
10 – After traveling to a cave you once found when a child, you find a skeleton of a child. Long since dead, a pair old cloths it wore that appear exactly like the ones that you once owned
11 – You find a tomb made of fossilized wood with strange glyphs carved upon it. After studying the glyphs you think you can read it, but hear ghostly sounds when you start to do so
12 – While traveling on a long forgotten road you come across a coaching-inn. You open the door and see fey and goblinoid creatures enraptured in a wild scene of debauchery and unspeakable acts. You flee but the scene in seared into your mind
13 – In your travels you find a huge flowering plant with a large silver sphere in the center of the flower. (if removed) The orb transforms into a malicious leprechaun that torments you at in opportune times with song and dance
14 – You find a geyser that erupts erratically, sometimes days, sometimes months apart. When showered by the geyser you gain great insights (+1d4 Int and Wis for 1 week).
15 – While tracking your lost horse, you find a tar infested canyon hidden in the wilds. Deep within you find your horse being eaten by a diseased and featherless Ruhk.
16 – You awake one morning with your feet painted red an a adorned crook at your side (value 150g). Occasionally you can see odd looking crickets in the trees above you peering in your direction.
17 – A carpet of rolling moss implants false memories into your head as you walk upon it. (roll again on the Adolescence Events Table, this event is merely a false memory)
18 – A small duck billed Hadrosaurid will periodically approach you when it thinks you are asleep and clean any parasites from your skin and hair. This is strangely soothing and does not wake you.
19 – After using a bar of soap given to you by a Dwarven trader, all of your body hair falls out. If eaten, the soap changes your gender.
20 – Lichen grows prolifically on a notably comfortable pair of boots you own and must be scraped daily to be kept clean. The lichen is eatable albeit not very tasty.
I am not sure if I will delve into adult events or not. I am getting a bit loopy after that last batch, and lets face it, adult life is boring anyhow.
Anyhow, this is the follow up to the traumatic childhood background generator. Onwards to the Traumatic Adolescent Background Generator:
COMELINESS 3d6
New ability score deriving physical appearance, roll 3d6. Discard this ability score at the end of adolescence. The memory will always haunt you however.
3 – Exiled from the village for being not of your race
4 – Ruthlessly tormented and forced to wear bag over head
5 – Beaten at random intervals for no apparent reason
6-8 – Brought along by your good-looking friends to stand next too
8-11 – Non-descript and utterly forgettable
12-14 - 1 in d4 chance to have a stalker (roll on Hirelings table)
15-16 – 1-3 in d4 chance to have a stalker (roll on Hirelings table)
17 – Ritualistically beaten by far uglier peers and family
18 – Extremely paranoid from lurid looks and random gropings from entire village
TEMPORARY WISDOM MODIFIER d6
The Wisdom for an adolescent can never be above 12. If the modified Wisdom is 0 or under, it is assumed the PC has gotten themselves killed in a spectacularly stupid manner.
1 – minus 6 (permanent injury incurred caused by lack of wisdom)
2 – minus 5 (temporary injury incurred caused by lack of wisdom)
3 – minus 4 (several scars caused by lack of wisdom)
4 – minus 3
5 – minus 2
6 – minus 1 (remarkably unscarred)
HIRELINGS d20
Aka – gullible friends. They will be available as future hirelings. Roll once unless your Charisma modifier is 0 (then you have no friends).
1 – An ill-tempered marmot capable of using tools but can not speak
2 – Friend of opposite sex, extremely attractive with no interest in you what-so-ever
3 – Lost Ogre who stays in the woods, friendly because you bring him small furry animals
4 – Disguised Fey creature entertaining himself for a few years
5 – Friend of same race, exact same interests, skills and traumas
6 – Friend of the same race, wholly inept
7 – A completely innocent, pure, and gullible friend of the same race
8 – Friend of the same race, who is better than you at just about everything
9 – A hopping bird with a smug look on its face
10 – Friend of different race, wholly inept
11 –The lone survivor of a decadent and extinct race
12 – Friend of different race, who is better than you at just about everything
13 – Some old hermit that follows you around
14 – A colony of lepers
15 – A dog that never stops barking
16 – A foreigner who can not speak your language but is remarkably loyal.
17 – The village retard with freakish strength
18 – Young orphan kid with a knack of finding snares and traps
19 – A blood-crazed and insane Knight who calls you ‘liege’
20 – A half-man half-cat that hides in your addict. Howls incessantly at the moon.
ACADEMIA d12
‘Trade skill’ is any knowledge applicable towards making a living. Fishing, begging, carpentry, pick pocketing, flogging, scribing, hole-digging, and so forth. Roll once.
1 – PC incapable of learning anything useful (hence their future career as adventurer)
2 – Trade skill learned but turns out to be wholly inept in any application
3 – Single trade skill learned and mastered
4-5 – No trade skills learned, but cursory knowledge of a great many things
6-8 – Two trade skills learned and re-roll (ignore 1)
9-10 – Two trade skills learned
11-12 – Single trade skilled learned
LANGUAGES d12
Roll as many times as your Intelligence language modifier allows (0-3 times usually). Player or DM choose the language they wish to learn, results below.
1 – Gibberish, the language was made up by a hard-up or insane instructor
2 – Language learned, but different language than intended
3 – Language learned with strangely alluring dialect
4-5 – Language learned and mastered with fluency as if born with it
6-8 – Language learned remedially, many words have entirely different meaning than what you think they do
9-10 – Language can be written and read, but unable to pronounce
11 – Language learned, and can understand all similar languages
12 –Language learned with annoying and irritating dialect
TRAUMATIC ADOLESCENT EVENTS d12
Count the number of odd dice rolls thus far. Roll on this table that many times (1-5 usually).
1 – Re-roll twice and combine the events. Ignore 1.
2 – Re-roll. You learn an appropriate trade skill from applicable event.
3-5 – Horror Event
6-8 – Romance Event
9-11 – Adventure Event
12 – Weird/Other Event
HORROR EVENT d20
1 – Head stuck in a hole in ground for 1d8 days. Something licks your legs periodically during your entrapment.
2 – Deranged hermit pulling a cart with unidentified meat follows you around at night for 1d4 years
3 – Walking barnacles abscond 1d4 members of your family and are never seen again
4 – Tawdry and irksome fey spirit prevents you from getting a good nights rest for 1d4 years
5 – Any deceased siblings or family reanimate and haunt your village periodically
6 – Another is blamed for a crime that you commit and is burned on a pyre. A revenant in a twisted amalgam of fire and that person seeks to slay you twice a year
7 – A Kalevope culls the lands around your dwelling once a year, no matter where you live
8 – A priest inadvertently turns you with his turn undead ability. It appears to effect you
9 – Strange ticks grow under you skin and must be burned out lest they multiply
10 – A wingless forest drake smashes your dwelling while you are not home and devours all inside. It used the remaining timbers for its nest
11 – A horrid Nakki drags you into its stagnant pool and forces you to clean the bones of its victims. In 1d6 years you manage to escape with many horrible tales.
12 – A water nymph enslaves you but is utterly boring. You are released 1d4 years later with few tales to tell.
13 – A group of carnivorous ape-men ransack your village leaving you as the only survivor
14 – Nomadic Frog-Yetis encamp near your village causing much horror and strife for 1d6 months. By the time they leave over half of the village is dead or maimed.
15 – You are enslaved by the Carpmen of Raelenac and forced to scrape abalone shells on a Meglo-Coy for 1d4 years before escaping.
16 – A small but playful Trent ensnares your legs in its roots. It does not release you for 1d4 months.
17 – You fall down a sinkhole permeated with the remnants of Vaunderfel, the Great Spring. You age in reverse until reborn into a different being (re-roll stats and race). This occurs within 1d4 months time and none recognize you after.
18 – Desert raiders enslave your village forcing you to act as pack animals. You escape 1d6 years later.
19 – An old and forgotten being of enormous power is released from its bygone prison by your meddling. It promises to repay you someday, searing your mind as it communicates.
20 – While sleeping in the wilderness you get enveloped by a Sky-Shell and live within a pocket of air and fluids inside of the creature for 1d6 months before escaping.
ROMANCE EVENT d20
1 – You have absolutely no romance in your adolescence and are mocked ceaselessly by your peers
2 – Desert raiders abscond you into slavery, forcing you act as a pleasure slave in the profane Ziggurats of the Man-Bull. You are released 1d4 years later. Gain a trade skill.
3 – The sexually frustrated Elf maids from the Village of Two Stars kidnap and fight with one another over mating rituals for 1d4 years. Still unresolved, you eventually escape.
4 – A moonlight date to some abandoned ruins result into running for life from crazed flesh-eating Halflings. Your date has 1 in d4 chance of escaping and naming you hero.
5 – A walk on the shores of nearby lake with your date results in a tribe of intelligent sand-crabs worshiping you both as a god.
6 – A winged fey creature becomes infatuated with you for 1d4 years, following you day and night
7 – Your hireling falls madly in love with you (applicable if you rolled on the hireling table, otherwise re-roll)
8 – You are forced into an arrange marriage by your family, roll for race and birthright of new family
9 – You fall madly in love with a Knights squire. The belligerent Knight hates you at first sight. They quickly travel away but you vow to find them one day (squire can be male or female or any race)
10 – An orphan vagrant falls madly in love you with and follows you around until death
11 – You find a potential mate to be amazingly beautiful and attractive. Everyone else you speak with talks about this person as if they are the ugliest person in the village
12 – The one you love cares not for you. An ancient family text speaks of a mushroom from the Great Rot that will infatuate all who look upon you should you devour it. A map of the location of where these mushrooms can be found are located in the book.
13 – A rival courtier of the one you love challenges you to a duel. You accept and accidentally geld the person. None in the village will be seen with you now.
14 – A wizard/sorceress falls in love you with you and is constantly changing their shape into alluring forms to gain your love.
15 – When finally alone with your date, you inexplicable turn into a fox-beast and attempt to devour them. None believe the tale.
16 – A wayward spirit steals a part of your spirit. You can feel no love nor lust until you retrieve it from them.
17 – You awake one morning married in Astrumdantalas with a mate of ill-repute whom you never recall meeting.
18 – An ogre of the opposite sex finds you and drags you off to their cave. You barely escape the event, but still hear forlorn cries from that area of the wilderness to this day.
19 – You awake most mornings with smallish fey creatures cuddled against you. They leave tiny offerings of flowers, sweet food and perfumes.
20 – You spy your long time love laying eggs in the wilderness one evening.
ADVENTURE EVENT d20
1 – The PC finds a nest with an opal-eyed fox in it. The fox follows the PC around and attempts to remove the skin from my other humanoids its comes across
2 – You follow some singing in the distance and find several of the village females dancing and singing around huge nodding toad. The women flee if confronted, but the toad-thing speaks to you of fantastic adventures to the far south.
3 – You find a pole in the wilds that climbs higher than you see. You climb it as far as you can but it appears to be endless.
4 – While traveling six screaming men run past you with ruined clothing and smoldering hair. One of them drops a half-burned tome that speaks of an underground desert.
5 – A traveling Bard plays a song of a Bard trapped in a keep who is forced to play music to keep an angry tribe of man-eating bears asleep. The next day when you speak of the Bard none know what or who you speak of.
6 – While swimming in a lake you find a large tablet of polished coral. You drag it up the surface and see upon it a miniature city of incredible detail. The city appears to be abandoned but you see tiny sculptures of minuscule shrimp among the coral.
7 – After stealing a shield from a wandering Knight, a magic mouth follows you endlessly insulting you in many strange tongues. A wizard agree to remove the magic mouth, but only if you find him some rare grasses from the Valley of Endless Summer.
8 – A colony of lepers imposes themselves into the center of town unless the PC find them a new home.
9 – The fields of rye turn ashen and start to rot from the ground up. On your land you find a small cave leading under the fields of rye.
10 – As penance for committing an act of heresy, the local Priest-Lord send you on a quest to find an ancient knight an honorable death in combat. He puts emphasis on ‘honorable’. (Gain ancient knight as henchman until he has found an honorable death)
11 – A troupe of Marggots build a carnival some miles away and the village sends you to find out what it is all about.
12 – A fetid and diseased rhino stumbles near your home. When dealing with the creature it vomits a ruby encrusted bracer (value 500g). When worn the PC hears faint chuckling.
13 – A huge flightless birds runs into your dwelling, takes your most valuable possession in its beak and flees and blurring speed. You track it the best you can but you only know it headed towards a thicket of foreboding woods that none enter.
14 – While near a waterfall you think you saw a pair of feline eyes behind it. Exploring behind the water fall you see a crevice that sinks into the depths. You also find a huge discarded cat-claw larger than you are.
15 – While looking for a camping site you come across a meadow with a dozen Dwarves that appear to be sleeping. They all are simply overcome with lethargy and stare upwards. When you look upwards you see a low hanging cloud with a near invisible rope hanging down.
16 – A theater troupe stages a play that insults the local lord. All are due to be executed in a week unless they can make the lord laugh. They are all foreigners who can not speak the native language. Only you can translate for them.
17 – A group of pygmies wearing feather-clothing jumps out as you walk on a road and toss spears at you, some wounding you. When they hear your angry cries they flee up the tall trees. You can see platforms in the high canopy.
18 – A PC is given the deed to a pawn-shop in a nearby city. The store is in complete shambles, vagrants often use it to sleep in, and a crazy dwarf lives in the walls.
19 – A crazed Tyrannosaurus assault your village and you miraculously defeat with legendary bravery and guile. The local lord is so impressed he sends you on mission after mission of nearly suicidal quests.
20 – A half-man half-raccoon stumbles towards you camp, lets out and chattering sound then tosses a pouch of regurgitated seeds in your lap. Before you can respond it flees to a taboo vale that none enter.
WEIRD/OTHER EVENT d20
1 – A fey creature leaves a child at your door step. (if taken) the child grows to adulthood in 1d4 years, looking exactly like you
2 – While working you see a cat standing on a strange pillow that flies above the ground. If followed it eventually lifts off high into the night sky
3 – While in a drunken brawl, a wounded friend appear to be bleeding water. When closely inspected they flee. When met the following day they pass it off as you being drunk
4 – A sullen painter asks you to pose for a portrait. After a few hours he starts screaming and runs off never to be seen again. The painting is of you sitting upon a bronze throne with ruby-eyed imps prostrating themselves at your feet
5 – You find a Cudgel like weapon wrought from fossilized wood embedded in the side of a hill The Cudgel is larger than your dwelling
6 – Your friend swears on his life that he saw the chair in his room beat the snot out of his table. His table appears to be in shambles and the chair looks remarkably smug
7 – When coming home one day you find a group of six trilobites carrying your (most valuable possession) under your dwelling
8 – A saber-tooth cat will periodically jump on your back out of no where, give you a quick mauling, and then scamper off leaving only superficial wounds
9 – After bathing in a small pond of tranquil and serene water your notice your hair is remarkably full, flowing and vibrant. It grows quickly past your shoulders and the slightest wind bellows it heroically
10 – After traveling to a cave you once found when a child, you find a skeleton of a child. Long since dead, a pair old cloths it wore that appear exactly like the ones that you once owned
11 – You find a tomb made of fossilized wood with strange glyphs carved upon it. After studying the glyphs you think you can read it, but hear ghostly sounds when you start to do so
12 – While traveling on a long forgotten road you come across a coaching-inn. You open the door and see fey and goblinoid creatures enraptured in a wild scene of debauchery and unspeakable acts. You flee but the scene in seared into your mind
13 – In your travels you find a huge flowering plant with a large silver sphere in the center of the flower. (if removed) The orb transforms into a malicious leprechaun that torments you at in opportune times with song and dance
14 – You find a geyser that erupts erratically, sometimes days, sometimes months apart. When showered by the geyser you gain great insights (+1d4 Int and Wis for 1 week).
15 – While tracking your lost horse, you find a tar infested canyon hidden in the wilds. Deep within you find your horse being eaten by a diseased and featherless Ruhk.
16 – You awake one morning with your feet painted red an a adorned crook at your side (value 150g). Occasionally you can see odd looking crickets in the trees above you peering in your direction.
17 – A carpet of rolling moss implants false memories into your head as you walk upon it. (roll again on the Adolescence Events Table, this event is merely a false memory)
18 – A small duck billed Hadrosaurid will periodically approach you when it thinks you are asleep and clean any parasites from your skin and hair. This is strangely soothing and does not wake you.
19 – After using a bar of soap given to you by a Dwarven trader, all of your body hair falls out. If eaten, the soap changes your gender.
20 – Lichen grows prolifically on a notably comfortable pair of boots you own and must be scraped daily to be kept clean. The lichen is eatable albeit not very tasty.
I am not sure if I will delve into adult events or not. I am getting a bit loopy after that last batch, and lets face it, adult life is boring anyhow.
Entry - One Page Dungeon Creation Contest
I am generally a sucker for contests so I recently did a write up for one floating around the OD&D blogs. Here is my submission to the One Page Adventure Design Contest. My submission is streamlined version of a homebrew adventure which I've had decent fun running several times in the past year. Also I'm a bit lazy in drawing new maps so that is another factor in not doing something on the spot.
As for the promotion, I like the idea for the 1-page adventures but in all honesty I find the format to be uninspired. It is a simple 'big map here' 'other crap every where else' with no formatting to speak of. I tend to be more creative with limitations so honestly things like word count, font type, strict layout would have been a favor to me.
So, what is a good 1-page adventure? The box set From the Ashes came with about 30 or so 1-page adventures that were terrific. Some I still use some to this day. Too bad the format in the contest can't really cater to this plot-heavy type of adventures. It seems like it is simply old-school for old-school sake rather than being practical.
As for the promotion, I like the idea for the 1-page adventures but in all honesty I find the format to be uninspired. It is a simple 'big map here' 'other crap every where else' with no formatting to speak of. I tend to be more creative with limitations so honestly things like word count, font type, strict layout would have been a favor to me.
So, what is a good 1-page adventure? The box set From the Ashes came with about 30 or so 1-page adventures that were terrific. Some I still use some to this day. Too bad the format in the contest can't really cater to this plot-heavy type of adventures. It seems like it is simply old-school for old-school sake rather than being practical.
Monday, April 13, 2009
A fire-breathing were-mammoth destroys half the village while calling your name
Yes, slow day at work today so this is my 'Traumatic Childhood Background PC Generator'. Perhaps I will work up an adolescent and adult events one day.. anyhow this is for childhood events.
So grab some dice and start rolling:
RACE d4
1 – Human 2 - Elf 3 – Dwarf 4 – Halfling
SEX (use roll above)
If your dice is to the right of you, Male. To the left, Female.
CLASS d4
1 – Fighter 2 – Magic User 3- Thief 4 - Cleric
ALIGNMENT (use roll above)
Light colored dice, good. Dark colored, evil. Mid-tone, Neutral.
SOCIETY d10
1 – Lost/Alien
2 - Decadent
3 - Nomadic
4 - Tribal
5 - Hierarchical
6 - Autocratic
7 - Feudal
8 - Communal
9 - Progressive
10 – Re-roll twice and combine. Ignore 10.
BIRTHRIGHT d10
1 – Slave/Exile
2 - Serf
3 – Lowborn Commoner
4 – Highborn Commoner
5 - Merchant
6 - Guilder
7 - Craftsmen
8 - Clergy
9 - Nobility
10 – Re-roll twice and combine. Ignore 10.
FAMILY d10
Even – Both parents alive
1 – Both parents dead
3 – Mother dead
5 – Father dead
7 – Bastard child
9 –No family, raised on the streets/wilds
D8-1 for Siblings, 8s are re-rolled twice and added.
TRAUMATIC CHILDHOOD EVENTS d12
Count the number of odd dice rolls thus far. Roll on this table that many times (1-5 usually).
1 – Re-roll twice and combine the events. Ignore 1.
2 – Re-roll. This occurred but the PC blocks the memory out.
3-5 – Conflict Event
6-8 – Criminal Event
9-11 – Adventure Event
12 – Weird/Other Event
CONFLICT EVENT d20
1 – Re-roll event, this event results in the characters death. Re-roll character
2 – Chagmen rampage your homeland stealing all pre-teen males (yourself included if male). You are to blame for enraging the Chagmen. (all male siblings die)
3 – Giant leeches erupt from the ground killing those to slow to flee. You are to blame for awakening the leeches. (1d4 siblings die)
4 – A headless Giants smashes every building in your village, except for yours.
5 – Your homeland was surrounded and starved by the Ladoga Imperial Army for 1d10 years.(1d4 siblings die)
6 – An army of semi-intelligent forest animals rampages through your homeland. Your people blame you.
7 – A belligerent drunk starts a riot that burns your village to the ground. The drunk is your closest family member/friend.
8 – A family of Tuehni live in your basement for 1d4 years, occasionally dragging the unwary to their doom.(1d4 siblings die)
9 – A swarm of hundreds of Molletuesks lay their eggs in your homeland. It is said you are to blame.
10 – The Elf Village of Ten Winds slays every able-bodied man in your village looking for the acorn of the World Tree that you stole from them.
11 – An small army of Fionn riding Toucans raiding your village cutting and stealing the dwellers hair. You are the only survivor with their hair unscathed.
12 – After you insult a stranger, the stranger uses an Oculus power to burn your village to the ground.(1d4 siblings die)
13 – A cadre of Dwarven clergy men defile every holy place in your village due to your presence.
14 – A walking tree chases you throughout the village after you angered its spirit. Nothing grows where it chased you to this day.
15 – A small army of water-monkeys steals everything metallic and shiny from your village after you stole a shiny stone from their stone pile.
16 – A fire-breathing were-mammoth destroys half the village while calling your name.(1d6 siblings die)
17 – A swarm of Marggots raid your village, feasting upon its children. You are the lone child survivor.
18 – The Walking Stone completely obliterates your village as it chases you through your homeland.(1d8 siblings die)
19 – A herd of decaying and water-logged horses erupt from the river and hunt you ruthlessly after you toss some salt into their river. Most of the village is destroyed.(1d6 siblings die)
20 – Re-roll twice and combine events. Ignore duplicate results.
CRIMINAL EVENT d20
1 – The PC is accosted for brigandage. The PC is forced to wear iron boots for 1d4 years.
2 – The PC is accosted for begging in the presence of a noble. The PC is forced to wear a halter for 1d10 days and walk through the streets of his homeland.
3 – PC is accosted for piracy and transfer of illicit slaves. The PC is racked for 7 days and nights. The PC is 1 inch taller.
4 – The PC is accosted for stealing dog food. PC is placed in a rat cage with 2d12 rats for 1d10 days.
5 – The PC is accosted for strangling small animals. PC is hanged until unconsciousness every day for 7 days.
6 – The PC is accosted for attempted murder of a high noble. The PC miraculously escape before certain death and starts a new life. Re-roll Society and Birthright.
7 – The PC is accosted for arson. PC is seared with boiling oil.
8 – The village witch accuses the PC of angering the spirits. The PC is lashed for 3 days and so is the witch.
9 – The PC is accosted for raiding the royal harem. They are chemically gelded. The PC is now a eunuch.
10 – The PC is accosted for horse theft. The PC released after the horse steals a child and is later captured and put down.
11 – The PC is accosted for capturing and bottling fey creatures. The PC is placed in a brass tub and soaked in rotten fluids for 1d6 days.
12 – The PC befriends a kindly blacksmith who later turns out to be Medlacklon the Black Vile, an infamous assassin. The PC is released out of fear.
13 – The PC is accosted to defiling holy relics. The PC is magically compelled to only tell truths.
14 – The PC is accosted for sedition. The laws of the kingdom are written upon the PCs flesh and remain to this day.
15 – The PC blatantly slays the village bully in a fit of rage. No one knows this.
16 – The PC is accosted for heresy after a water nymph follows the PC where ever they go and seduces all in her wake. The PC is later acquitted after the judge is seduced.
17 – The PC is accosted for horse mangling after a noble tramples the PC and lames his horse. The PC is imprisoned and beaten daily by the noble for 1d4 years.
18 – The PC is accosted for counterfeiting. The PCs hands were binded for 1d4 years with a coin in each.
19 – The PC beats a bully child only to find out the child is the disguised Prince of the realm. A large stone is tied to the PCs waist and they must drag it for 1d6 years.
20 – Re-roll twice and combine events. Ignore duplicate results. The PC is entirely innocent of said crimes.
ADVENTURE EVENT d20
1 – The PC finds a Chagmen who offers the PC a large sapphire if the PC bring him a child to devour. If the PC accepts, the gem is worth 2000gp but the child ghost haunts him.
2 – The PC finds a large leathery egg on the beach of a large lake. The PC kept it safe for years but the egg has not changed nor hatched (yet..).
3 – The PC sets off to kill mice for an odd job. After setting a trap the PC finds a mouse with a hat, a tiny crossbow and a tiny belt. The mouse speaks and offers the PC treasure if they free him. (If they agree) The mouse gives the PC thousands of tiny gold coins, value, 1gp.
4 – A Halfling mistress of Gnaeun accosts and marries the PC in a strange land. The PC is later released and wanders back home, only left with the words that she will return for them at a later date.
5 – The PC finds a underground chasm that leads to a underground valley still carrying the full effects of The Great Rot. Occasionally the PC sees walking mushrooms following them.
6 – A rotting river otter corpse follows the PC home one day, scratching at his window and door then scampering away when confronted. Eventually the corpse is found outside the PCs window unmoving. A silver otter amulet is clutched in its jaws, value, 200gp.
7 – A lone knight crosses paths with the PC while on the road. The knight speaks of the PCs eventual heroic deeds and honor before riding off. A few days later the PC sees the knight ‘s image on a mausoleum in his travels, apparently a Paladin who perished an age ago.
8 – A rancid behemoth hippo attacks the PCs village and the PC lured it away. Unfortunately the thing dwells under a well used bridge cutting off the main road too and from the town.
9 – The PC accidentally released a group of desiccated Halflings from a bygone barrow. The Halfling Ghouls stalk the village and terrorize the entire area.
10 – The PC finds a man in rich garbs in the deep woods being strangled by a feathered imp-creature. The PC scares off the imp but the man is dead. A book on the man contains information on spells and ritual to conjure creatures from other places.
11 – The PC finds a bush with plump orange leaves which are edible. The PC seems impervious to sickness if they consume at least one per week. Only the PC knows where this plant is.
12 – The PC finds a piece of ice that never melts. When carried the PC feels as if they are being watched.
13 – The PC find a large tar pit and strange fey creatures appear to live within. They have invited the PC into the pit to see their home but the PC has yet to accept.
14 – A traveling Elf maid gives the PC an orchid plant. The orchid never changes and is perpetually pointing towards one direction, even if turned or moved. If the Orchid is followed like a compass, it leads to a strange and wondrous place leagues away.
15 – The PC finds a lone bolder marbled with lapis. Before the PC can take any, a deer-spirit emerges and begs the PC to leave it. (if heeded) A yellow deer can be seen in the distance when the PC is in the wilds. (if ignored) Gain 1500gp in lapis.
16 – One hundred fat hamsters scamper across the road when the PC is traveling. If followed they dive into a sinkhole writhing through mud and compost. The PC follows the narrow path and finds an underground ziggurat on a miniature scale.
17 – The PC came face to face with the dread wurm Haecern while on the roads. The wurm demanded tribute but when the PC had little to offer, the wurm only mentioned it would ask again one day.
18 – In a pile of family books the PC comes across a map of an island west of Kaboria. This island is not listed on any other map the PC has found. Scrawled across the map in giant letters reads 'BEWARE THE PARROTS!'.
19 – An uncle visits the PC and tells them grand tales of adventure in the southern lands of Saltwhisker Glens. The uncle speaks of a Marggot King who owes him his life and says to speak his name should they travel to there.
20 – The PC is dragged away by a group of cat-men and taken to a desert city where the PC is forces to dance and juggle. After many months the PC escaped and find their way home, but none believe their tale.
WEIRD/OTHER EVENT d20
1 – Perfectly normal childhood. The PCs peers mock the child for his normalcy.
2 – Every morning the PC wakes up and finds a silver piece under their head, as well as a splitting headache.
3 – PC is ruthlessly hunted by Dwarven slave-traders for an unknown reason. The Dwarves have a very annoying war cry they scream when ever they see the PC, 'Vbblalalalbalalalalbala!'
4 – Rats and other vermin hate the PC and attack on sight. Other animals find the PCs skin very tasty.
5 – Strange words appear in the PCs mind when they dream and the PC can usually remember them. If spoken aloud nearby spirits take notice.
6 – The PC dreams of another life and other experiences. Generate another entirely new character for the PCs alter ego in this dream world. At some point of time the personalities will switch.
7 – Halfling precognition is always blank in areas where the PC should be. This greatly unsettles Halflings.
8 – Once per full moon a lead tablet with the PCs name will appear near them during the night. Should this tablet be harmed in any way, the PC will suffer the applicable effects as well.
9 – A crow will occasionally follow the PC and bark guttural words that appear to mock the current situation.
10 – When ever the PC has broken an egg, someone very close to that PC has died.
11 – A pearl button seems to appear on the PC clothing, no matter what they are wearing. Random buttons the PCs apparel are usually missing as well.
12 – The PC gains a sense of inexplicable serenity when pointing towards the north-east. The PC gains a feeling of loathing when pointed another direction.
13 – Occasionally when the PC is alone in the wilds, a talking hedge lizard will roam near the PC and gives them non-sense advice.
14 – After the PC was beaten ruthlessly with cattails by a group of fey, the PC seems to never get hungry and must be reminded to eat or else starve to death.
15 – Ashes appear in the PCs footsteps after they commit an evil act.
16 – When drunk, the PC can see and communicate with spirits, much to the chagrin of the spirits.
17 – The PC can play any instrument even though they have never learned how.
18 – The PC can speak and communicate with moving machinery. The machinery completely lacks humor or sarcasm but is fond of well-oiled puns.
19 – The PC is compelled to travel to Nifflaer during the Lightless Day of Loksos and dance naked for days on end.
20 – The PC is not actually of his race, but their form was forced upon them as punishment for some prior transgression. The DM should instead create another race for the PC which was their original form and former life.
Appropriate phobias, nightmares, paranoia, nervous twitching, and likelihood to burst into tears at random times should likewise be recorded.
So grab some dice and start rolling:
RACE d4
1 – Human 2 - Elf 3 – Dwarf 4 – Halfling
SEX (use roll above)
If your dice is to the right of you, Male. To the left, Female.
CLASS d4
1 – Fighter 2 – Magic User 3- Thief 4 - Cleric
ALIGNMENT (use roll above)
Light colored dice, good. Dark colored, evil. Mid-tone, Neutral.
SOCIETY d10
1 – Lost/Alien
2 - Decadent
3 - Nomadic
4 - Tribal
5 - Hierarchical
6 - Autocratic
7 - Feudal
8 - Communal
9 - Progressive
10 – Re-roll twice and combine. Ignore 10.
BIRTHRIGHT d10
1 – Slave/Exile
2 - Serf
3 – Lowborn Commoner
4 – Highborn Commoner
5 - Merchant
6 - Guilder
7 - Craftsmen
8 - Clergy
9 - Nobility
10 – Re-roll twice and combine. Ignore 10.
FAMILY d10
Even – Both parents alive
1 – Both parents dead
3 – Mother dead
5 – Father dead
7 – Bastard child
9 –No family, raised on the streets/wilds
D8-1 for Siblings, 8s are re-rolled twice and added.
TRAUMATIC CHILDHOOD EVENTS d12
Count the number of odd dice rolls thus far. Roll on this table that many times (1-5 usually).
1 – Re-roll twice and combine the events. Ignore 1.
2 – Re-roll. This occurred but the PC blocks the memory out.
3-5 – Conflict Event
6-8 – Criminal Event
9-11 – Adventure Event
12 – Weird/Other Event
CONFLICT EVENT d20
1 – Re-roll event, this event results in the characters death. Re-roll character
2 – Chagmen rampage your homeland stealing all pre-teen males (yourself included if male). You are to blame for enraging the Chagmen. (all male siblings die)
3 – Giant leeches erupt from the ground killing those to slow to flee. You are to blame for awakening the leeches. (1d4 siblings die)
4 – A headless Giants smashes every building in your village, except for yours.
5 – Your homeland was surrounded and starved by the Ladoga Imperial Army for 1d10 years.(1d4 siblings die)
6 – An army of semi-intelligent forest animals rampages through your homeland. Your people blame you.
7 – A belligerent drunk starts a riot that burns your village to the ground. The drunk is your closest family member/friend.
8 – A family of Tuehni live in your basement for 1d4 years, occasionally dragging the unwary to their doom.(1d4 siblings die)
9 – A swarm of hundreds of Molletuesks lay their eggs in your homeland. It is said you are to blame.
10 – The Elf Village of Ten Winds slays every able-bodied man in your village looking for the acorn of the World Tree that you stole from them.
11 – An small army of Fionn riding Toucans raiding your village cutting and stealing the dwellers hair. You are the only survivor with their hair unscathed.
12 – After you insult a stranger, the stranger uses an Oculus power to burn your village to the ground.(1d4 siblings die)
13 – A cadre of Dwarven clergy men defile every holy place in your village due to your presence.
14 – A walking tree chases you throughout the village after you angered its spirit. Nothing grows where it chased you to this day.
15 – A small army of water-monkeys steals everything metallic and shiny from your village after you stole a shiny stone from their stone pile.
16 – A fire-breathing were-mammoth destroys half the village while calling your name.(1d6 siblings die)
17 – A swarm of Marggots raid your village, feasting upon its children. You are the lone child survivor.
18 – The Walking Stone completely obliterates your village as it chases you through your homeland.(1d8 siblings die)
19 – A herd of decaying and water-logged horses erupt from the river and hunt you ruthlessly after you toss some salt into their river. Most of the village is destroyed.(1d6 siblings die)
20 – Re-roll twice and combine events. Ignore duplicate results.
CRIMINAL EVENT d20
1 – The PC is accosted for brigandage. The PC is forced to wear iron boots for 1d4 years.
2 – The PC is accosted for begging in the presence of a noble. The PC is forced to wear a halter for 1d10 days and walk through the streets of his homeland.
3 – PC is accosted for piracy and transfer of illicit slaves. The PC is racked for 7 days and nights. The PC is 1 inch taller.
4 – The PC is accosted for stealing dog food. PC is placed in a rat cage with 2d12 rats for 1d10 days.
5 – The PC is accosted for strangling small animals. PC is hanged until unconsciousness every day for 7 days.
6 – The PC is accosted for attempted murder of a high noble. The PC miraculously escape before certain death and starts a new life. Re-roll Society and Birthright.
7 – The PC is accosted for arson. PC is seared with boiling oil.
8 – The village witch accuses the PC of angering the spirits. The PC is lashed for 3 days and so is the witch.
9 – The PC is accosted for raiding the royal harem. They are chemically gelded. The PC is now a eunuch.
10 – The PC is accosted for horse theft. The PC released after the horse steals a child and is later captured and put down.
11 – The PC is accosted for capturing and bottling fey creatures. The PC is placed in a brass tub and soaked in rotten fluids for 1d6 days.
12 – The PC befriends a kindly blacksmith who later turns out to be Medlacklon the Black Vile, an infamous assassin. The PC is released out of fear.
13 – The PC is accosted to defiling holy relics. The PC is magically compelled to only tell truths.
14 – The PC is accosted for sedition. The laws of the kingdom are written upon the PCs flesh and remain to this day.
15 – The PC blatantly slays the village bully in a fit of rage. No one knows this.
16 – The PC is accosted for heresy after a water nymph follows the PC where ever they go and seduces all in her wake. The PC is later acquitted after the judge is seduced.
17 – The PC is accosted for horse mangling after a noble tramples the PC and lames his horse. The PC is imprisoned and beaten daily by the noble for 1d4 years.
18 – The PC is accosted for counterfeiting. The PCs hands were binded for 1d4 years with a coin in each.
19 – The PC beats a bully child only to find out the child is the disguised Prince of the realm. A large stone is tied to the PCs waist and they must drag it for 1d6 years.
20 – Re-roll twice and combine events. Ignore duplicate results. The PC is entirely innocent of said crimes.
ADVENTURE EVENT d20
1 – The PC finds a Chagmen who offers the PC a large sapphire if the PC bring him a child to devour. If the PC accepts, the gem is worth 2000gp but the child ghost haunts him.
2 – The PC finds a large leathery egg on the beach of a large lake. The PC kept it safe for years but the egg has not changed nor hatched (yet..).
3 – The PC sets off to kill mice for an odd job. After setting a trap the PC finds a mouse with a hat, a tiny crossbow and a tiny belt. The mouse speaks and offers the PC treasure if they free him. (If they agree) The mouse gives the PC thousands of tiny gold coins, value, 1gp.
4 – A Halfling mistress of Gnaeun accosts and marries the PC in a strange land. The PC is later released and wanders back home, only left with the words that she will return for them at a later date.
5 – The PC finds a underground chasm that leads to a underground valley still carrying the full effects of The Great Rot. Occasionally the PC sees walking mushrooms following them.
6 – A rotting river otter corpse follows the PC home one day, scratching at his window and door then scampering away when confronted. Eventually the corpse is found outside the PCs window unmoving. A silver otter amulet is clutched in its jaws, value, 200gp.
7 – A lone knight crosses paths with the PC while on the road. The knight speaks of the PCs eventual heroic deeds and honor before riding off. A few days later the PC sees the knight ‘s image on a mausoleum in his travels, apparently a Paladin who perished an age ago.
8 – A rancid behemoth hippo attacks the PCs village and the PC lured it away. Unfortunately the thing dwells under a well used bridge cutting off the main road too and from the town.
9 – The PC accidentally released a group of desiccated Halflings from a bygone barrow. The Halfling Ghouls stalk the village and terrorize the entire area.
10 – The PC finds a man in rich garbs in the deep woods being strangled by a feathered imp-creature. The PC scares off the imp but the man is dead. A book on the man contains information on spells and ritual to conjure creatures from other places.
11 – The PC finds a bush with plump orange leaves which are edible. The PC seems impervious to sickness if they consume at least one per week. Only the PC knows where this plant is.
12 – The PC finds a piece of ice that never melts. When carried the PC feels as if they are being watched.
13 – The PC find a large tar pit and strange fey creatures appear to live within. They have invited the PC into the pit to see their home but the PC has yet to accept.
14 – A traveling Elf maid gives the PC an orchid plant. The orchid never changes and is perpetually pointing towards one direction, even if turned or moved. If the Orchid is followed like a compass, it leads to a strange and wondrous place leagues away.
15 – The PC finds a lone bolder marbled with lapis. Before the PC can take any, a deer-spirit emerges and begs the PC to leave it. (if heeded) A yellow deer can be seen in the distance when the PC is in the wilds. (if ignored) Gain 1500gp in lapis.
16 – One hundred fat hamsters scamper across the road when the PC is traveling. If followed they dive into a sinkhole writhing through mud and compost. The PC follows the narrow path and finds an underground ziggurat on a miniature scale.
17 – The PC came face to face with the dread wurm Haecern while on the roads. The wurm demanded tribute but when the PC had little to offer, the wurm only mentioned it would ask again one day.
18 – In a pile of family books the PC comes across a map of an island west of Kaboria. This island is not listed on any other map the PC has found. Scrawled across the map in giant letters reads 'BEWARE THE PARROTS!'.
19 – An uncle visits the PC and tells them grand tales of adventure in the southern lands of Saltwhisker Glens. The uncle speaks of a Marggot King who owes him his life and says to speak his name should they travel to there.
20 – The PC is dragged away by a group of cat-men and taken to a desert city where the PC is forces to dance and juggle. After many months the PC escaped and find their way home, but none believe their tale.
WEIRD/OTHER EVENT d20
1 – Perfectly normal childhood. The PCs peers mock the child for his normalcy.
2 – Every morning the PC wakes up and finds a silver piece under their head, as well as a splitting headache.
3 – PC is ruthlessly hunted by Dwarven slave-traders for an unknown reason. The Dwarves have a very annoying war cry they scream when ever they see the PC, 'Vbblalalalbalalalalbala!'
4 – Rats and other vermin hate the PC and attack on sight. Other animals find the PCs skin very tasty.
5 – Strange words appear in the PCs mind when they dream and the PC can usually remember them. If spoken aloud nearby spirits take notice.
6 – The PC dreams of another life and other experiences. Generate another entirely new character for the PCs alter ego in this dream world. At some point of time the personalities will switch.
7 – Halfling precognition is always blank in areas where the PC should be. This greatly unsettles Halflings.
8 – Once per full moon a lead tablet with the PCs name will appear near them during the night. Should this tablet be harmed in any way, the PC will suffer the applicable effects as well.
9 – A crow will occasionally follow the PC and bark guttural words that appear to mock the current situation.
10 – When ever the PC has broken an egg, someone very close to that PC has died.
11 – A pearl button seems to appear on the PC clothing, no matter what they are wearing. Random buttons the PCs apparel are usually missing as well.
12 – The PC gains a sense of inexplicable serenity when pointing towards the north-east. The PC gains a feeling of loathing when pointed another direction.
13 – Occasionally when the PC is alone in the wilds, a talking hedge lizard will roam near the PC and gives them non-sense advice.
14 – After the PC was beaten ruthlessly with cattails by a group of fey, the PC seems to never get hungry and must be reminded to eat or else starve to death.
15 – Ashes appear in the PCs footsteps after they commit an evil act.
16 – When drunk, the PC can see and communicate with spirits, much to the chagrin of the spirits.
17 – The PC can play any instrument even though they have never learned how.
18 – The PC can speak and communicate with moving machinery. The machinery completely lacks humor or sarcasm but is fond of well-oiled puns.
19 – The PC is compelled to travel to Nifflaer during the Lightless Day of Loksos and dance naked for days on end.
20 – The PC is not actually of his race, but their form was forced upon them as punishment for some prior transgression. The DM should instead create another race for the PC which was their original form and former life.
Appropriate phobias, nightmares, paranoia, nervous twitching, and likelihood to burst into tears at random times should likewise be recorded.
Monday, April 6, 2009
Cleric Rationale
Rationalizing Clerics has troubled me since starting Valley of Blue Snails, and I have thus far avoided the issue by skirting over all but the most basic details. Naturally this has to end as I am sewing up some loose ends as I am putting together a working copy of the rules and setting. I have about a month left however, which is enough time for some new ideas.
One idea I have been messing with is using a pantheon war between four or five pantheons. The pantheons would likely be fairly straight forward with vastly different agendas and philosophies. Naturally they come into conflict with one another and use their mortal power-base to wipe each other out. So which pantheons? I am not sure yet, but I need something that would have constant conflict within civilization. My first inclinations (and cheesy names off the top of my head):
Fiorse (Finnic/Norse) - Finnic and Norse have similar themes, stories and philosophies. A lot of the gods themselves are practically interchangeable. Hierarchical but independently motivated with vying agendas. Generally have the best interest of themselves and the world at heart.
Egyines - (Egyptian/Chinese) - Foreign pantheon encroaching on the civilized areas of the campaign. Thus while they are definitely human/humanoid, they have very different and alien philosophies. Similar to above with a hierarchical map of gods, although their vision of good/evil and right and wrong are vastly different.
Paragons - Each race has a paragon deity(or deities) which embodies the archetype of that race. They will have their own pantheon and it will include everything from humans to elves to fey to dragons to were-elephants. The deities are equally powerful and quite potent. They however rarely work together and only have the best interest of their patron race to care for.
Nehmerian - (Nehwon/Cimmerian) - These gods are identifiable as human or humanoid but usually more eccentric and defiantly more rogue. They have no organization and battle with each other as often as other pantheons. This is the largest 'pantheon', at least by sheer numbers of deities. This is the home of the 'failed' Paragons as well.
'Old Gods' - This will blanket anything that is not above including primeval deities, deities from long ago, elemental or natural force deities, loathsome unfathomable deities, and just about anything else that does not fit in.
The most important thing is that they fight with one another considerably. And so a good reasons for mace wielding, spell casting, holy warriors to be around. They would naturally vie with other pantheons foremost, and with each other secondarily. Temples would be erected either towards an entire pantheon or specific deities. Specific deities mostly, although other deities of the same pantheon could certainly be worshiped there, at least if the first few examples above.
Deities that are clearly historical will use a thinly veiled disguises with a name change and perhaps some small changed to fit the setting. Most of the others I will make up on the fly. Individual Clerics would support a specific deity first, and pantheon secondarily. They would fully be expected to battle on the front lines using martial skills in combination with divine magics.
The gods themselves are strictly tied to their nature and simply do not know how to behave otherwise. This makes them have little reason to interfere directly with mortals, unless it is simply to fuck with them. Most mortals are far too unpredictable for gods, sort of like a shovel with a hose for a handle. Gods will usually only speak to the most obedient and best trained priests who act as close to them as they possible - and so these priest end up being the most powerful. The gods are also not omnipotent; they may have prophecies to share but can not tell for sure what the future will hold. Gods frequently make mistakes when they delve into things that are not in their nature - and so most gods loath to do so. Gods can understand what all mortals say but can not listen to their minds. Lastly gods can and do die.
Anyhow, some of this will likely change as I mull it over. Perhaps drastically if I come up with something better.
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